came to my senses...
if i don't forget you fast, i'm the only one who's gonna get hurt...
but then again, if only things were so easy?
it's only been two days and all this missing is driving me crazy...
i can't even think straight in lectures anymore...
sometimes i wish i had a satellite, so i could see you with the stupid GPRS system...
make me just feel a little closer to you...
even if it's just an inch...
my blog is really dead.. and it's been such a long time since i blogged..
really f-ed up these days so i decided to blog.
it takes much lesser time than writing my diary by hand.. so i'm just ranting here anyway.. don't mind me if you happen to pass by, which i think nobody would by now.. even if you see all these things, please don't tell me man..
seriously, it's so frustrating.. i don't really think i've done much during the past three days but so much has happened. we just got closer by a little and i was starting to feel maybe getting back together was a good thing after all, but one fine day the sky just has to drop down on my like some irritating bird shit, and poofff everything's gone again.. life sucks for me, i'm sure for some others it does even more, and maybe i shouldn't complain.. but hey.. i've been yelled at from 1am to 5am that day, had to go to school and ran 15 rounds plus PT for PE that day, came back looking like shit and getting questioned by my mum, then getting questioned by my dad, having to sort things out through ziqing, and getting ranted and suspected again AND FINALLY getting slapped by my mum for scolding vulgarities(i thought i lost MY PHONE okay???) what's wrong with the world?? seriously?? sometimes it sucks so much i just don't know who to get my revenge on anymore.. but hey look on the bright side. nth can get worse.. right???now i'm stuck with my gp essay.. cause i chose to and that i have nth to stuff my mind with.. i've been really out of sorts recently... doing things like forgetting where i leave my phone.. which i never do.. i don't even let anyone touch my phone at times... it's like i get a scolding or a big fckin stare every few minutes! when is my life going to turn for the better anyway??? i'm not even talking to him anymore.. i really want to.. but it's really impossible.. i have to stop thinking about him if not things like this will never end.. my bad days are going to freaking continue.. sad to say.. till now i still doubt he was really serious about us.. i really hope he was.. but i don't want him to wait too long.. hurts to wait, and for me, i was never a patient person... he says i'm running away from our problem and yeah.. i am in a way.. but what am i supposed to do??? make everyone in the world commit suicide and i'm supposed to live happily after that? it's selfish but yeah.. this can't go on anymore... no way we could have last either way.. should have never met you... my life just screwed up big time...
